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Mark Twain

US author

(11/30/1835 - 04/21/1910)


Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
Stupidity (5), Mouths (2), Doubt (2)Mark Twain (20)

There are laws to protect the freedom of the press's speech, but none that are worth anything to protect the people from the press.
Law (4), Freedom (4), Press (1), People (22)Mark Twain (20)

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
Minds (4), Lose (1)Mark Twain (20)

Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement.
Women (11), Siblings (1), Ugliness (2)Mark Twain (20)

Of all the animals, man is the only one that lies.
Mankind (5), Lies (5), Animals (10)Mark Twain (20)

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.
Smoking (3)Mark Twain (20)

It is by the fortune of God that, in this country, we have three benefits: freedom of speech, freedom of thought, and the wisdom never to use either.
God (7), Countries (2), Wisdom (11), Freedom (4)Mark Twain (20)

What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.
Birthdays (1), Kill (4)Mark Twain (20)

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
World (7), Life (17)Mark Twain (20)

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of congress. But I repeat myself.
People (22), Idiots (3), Congress (1), Politics (7)Mark Twain (20)

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.
Men (12), Truth (9), Liars (2)Mark Twain (20)

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
Age (3), Minds (4)Mark Twain (20)

It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
Animals (10), Dogs (4), Fight (2)Mark Twain (20)

When in doubt tell the truth.
Doubt (2), Truth (9), Wisdom (11)Mark Twain (20)

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Madness (2), Mysteries (1), Life (17)Mark Twain (20)

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
People (22), Sun (1), Minutes (2), Bank (4)Mark Twain (20)

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
Mankind (5), Animals (10), Dogs (4)Mark Twain (20)

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.
People (22), Wisdom (11)Mark Twain (20)

Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Life (17), Undertaker (1)Mark Twain (20)

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Truth (9), Facts (2)Mark Twain (20)